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Buhay ay langit sa piling mo

Posted on June 12, 2017 at 8:18 am | Categories: blog, News | No comments

Pinili ko dito. Ni hindi pumasok sa isip ko manirahan sa ibang bansa. Nagkaroon ng pagkakataon, pero di ko man lang sinilip. Gusto kong umuwi. Tutulong ako – ika ko pa.

Lumaki sa mga sundalo at mga guro, may kapatid na naligo sa idealismo, higit sampung taon na naglingkod sa gobyerno, mentor ko Alpha Sigma pa – alam ko ang paglilingkod.

“Di ka pwedeng magreklamo kung di ka kikilos”

Sinubukan ko naman, di lang kinaya. Nakakapagod din kasi. Parang ikaw pa ang mali pag nagbibigay puna. Parang ikaw pa ang “epal” kapag nagbibigay ka ng mas mabilis na paraan. Parang lahat nasanay na sa sablay. Di lang naman ako puro daldal. Nakikipag usap din naman ako sa dapat kausapin. Pero yun nga, puros tango pero ala din. O’ baka kulang lang ako sa follow-up.

“Dalawang taon pa, masasanay ka din” – ika ng tropa.

Pero tanungin mo ang lahat, alam nilang mali. Alam nila. As in alam nila. Nakakalito. Di naman kailangan maging matalino para malaman na sablay. Napansin ko ng madaming beses. Pero sige lang. Andar lang. Walang tumatayo. Pag ikaw ang tumayo – ikaw ang magulo. Kultura siguro. Di ko alam. Nakakatawa na nakakalungkot.

… it seems the Filipinos love their chains – or something along those lines, ika nga nung binaril sa airport tarmac.

Minsan, nasabi ko na di magtatagal gago na din ako. Di magtatagal, di na din ako aangal. Di na din ako kikilos. Hahayaan ko na lang. Kanya kanya na. Di ba’t wala ng mas malungkot dun?

Nasa apat taon na din nung bumalik ako. Wala pa din akong nagagawa kundi para lang sa sarili. Nakakahiya.

Baka gago na nga ako.

The Script

Posted on June 1, 2017 at 6:10 am | Categories: blog, News, photography | No comments

I love watching films or maybe its the stories that I like. Not sure really, but I always find time watching them. It’s either that or photography.

Think about movies. Not the story itself but how it was built. In my mind, the script gets created first, then selection of possible actors that would fit in the movie. You see, script is king. Every decision made is in the service of the script. The dress, the buildings, the conversations, the language, the entire set and behavior of actors are dedicated in getting the feel of the script to the viewer. The actors are important, of course, they are. That’s why they earn boatloads. They are the physical form of the character. But! they have to fit in the character – not the other way around. That’s why they get called for an audition and filtered out. The actors should be able to get the message across.

How many star-studded movies have you seen that eventually flopped? And how many were just glorious! though the actors were not famous. Difference? Yes, that was the difference =)   Maybe, sometimes, directors even does it on purpose – so that the shine of a star will not blind the viewer from the story.

It is challenging to get the actors first then figure out a script that ties them altogether. I am not in the film industry so I’ll just keep my mouth shut. But I think it’s somehow safe to say that it is not so much about the actors than it is about the story.

Now, if you’ll replace the script with a project statement and the actors with photographs, you’ll have one of many ways to create a body of work.

redlab*

Posted on February 16, 2016 at 9:34 am | Categories: blog, News, photography, Print | No comments

Out of obsession in creating and raising awareness in fine art photographic prints – redlab* is born.

redlab* is a highly specialized print studio; run and managed by exhibiting artist focused on Fine-Art photography and custom printing. If you’re looking for a custom printer for your artwork, give us a visit – www.redlabph.com

ILFORD Certified Printer Partner

Posted on February 16, 2016 at 9:16 am | Categories: Awards, blog, News, photography | No comments

ILFORD-CERTIFIED-PRINTER-PARTNER-BADGE

Countless hours of testing; pushing printer, ink and paper to its limits has been noticed. I am now an ILFORD Certified Printer Partner. Personally given by the ILFORD President on January 2016. This strengthens and further fuels my passion in printing only of the highest quality.

Update: I am no longer an ILFORD Certified Printer Partner. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time with them.

The Unforgiving Print

Posted on May 31, 2015 at 1:07 pm | Categories: blog, News, photography, Print | No comments

I have never seen a person refine faster in the craft of photography than a person who just started to print their work.

The print is unforgiving. Every mistake that you make will be seen in a print. That slight movement will produce a “ghost-like” blur. That chromatic aberration brought about by the lens you have and the f-stop of your choice will be evident. That pixel that you pushed or pull more than it can take – yup! banding. And that dust-spot that you failed to clean up will annoy you to no end.

Every little thing that you did not intend to do shall be shown to you.

So why print?

You probably know some already. The internet has a sea of reasons. From technology mishaps, to heightened value for your work, monetary gain to memories kept even if yours fail. The list goes on and on why should you print your work. But let me add three reasons from a personal standpoint in the mix.

It makes YOU sharper.
Printing makes you more aware of your every move. Having in mind that what you create will be printed later imposes a discipline that you never had before. From the moment you plant that tripod to the point you send it over to the printer – every move calculated. Every adjustment will be precise and purposeful. You will understand the meaning of adjustment in small increments. You will learn how to be patient. You’ll develop a flow of work – of things to check and double check. You will learn the value of consistency.

It’s there.
You can actually hold it. It is physical. Everybody can see it where it hangs. Everybody can hold it if you allow them to. Every hour that you spend shooting is an hour away from your home. You have decided that your photography is more important during that time. Every penny that you spend for your photography is a penny away from something else. Don’t you want something to show for? A million brushes but no painting?

A print is a tangible object created by you. There was nothing, and now there is something. And you made that possible.

It’s a legacy – yours.
With the proper care, your prints will outlast you. It will be something that you will be leaving behind. It is something that you have created out of love and nothing else. It was yours and yours alone. Dictated by no one and was a source of your pride and joy. It is the way you have seen the world – literally and figuratively. It will be something worth keeping.

I am certain that your first print will be your worst. But I also know that if you do not do it because of the same reason, you will never get to your best one. Everything grows. This holds true to almost everything that has life, unless you’re a rock. It takes time. It takes practice – purposeful practice. Do your best every time – could anyone ask for more?

As it is in many things in life, everything is not for everyone. Printing may not be for you. But if you’re serious in your photography and would like to refine your work – try printing. Best if you yourself will do it – learning will be efficient and much more faster, but it doesn’t have to be you. Take into account the economics of a printer and the regularity of printing your work. You can have a custom lab do it and, maybe ask for a feedback or a friend that has a printer. Share it with your family. Share it with your loved ones. It is the end-result of the time that you have taken away from them. What is important is that you print your work, and hopefully learn from them.  The cost will only be a fraction of your gear, and the benefits would be tremendous.

To Judge

Posted on July 11, 2014 at 8:30 am | Categories: blog, News, photography | 3 comments

Immediately after reaching home, with my shoes still on, I reached for my notepad and started clearing things up. I sent it to listeners in attendance whom I personally know. At 2AM I found myself wanting no confusion between what I truly believe in and what just happened. I wanted to explain further with gathered thoughts. I needed to clarify.

This morning, as I do almost everyday, I walk back and forth, back and forth thinking about things. But instead of concerning myself of personal matters, I have the judging scene playing in my head over and over again. I am still hearing the words being mentioned and thinking what could have I done better. What could have I done more. Or maybe, just maybe, I was in the wrong place.

Last nights judging of images left me somehow uneasy.

I applaud the participants in putting a part of themselves out there ready to be judged, specially knowing that the judges does not have a clue where they’re coming from. It takes a certain amount of courage to bare a part of yourself open for critique. It is not easy to hear things that finds you lacking but the experience, when handled wisely, can be a motivation to be more.

Our work  is a reflection of ourselves. And by the same token, the opinion of the judges are mirrors of their personal aesthetic, mindset and history. You change the judge, you change the winner.

If we truly believe that photography is an art, and this is key, then it should be about expression. Like in any other forms of art, it’s never about replication. It should be an interpretation. And to judge what is better only by technicalities is rather incomplete and somehow a path in the wrong direction. Governed by conventional do’s and dont’s, to the inexperienced, it is a slippery slope towards mediocrity.

Indeed a judge must be careful not to ‘box-in’ its listeners and allow creativity to nourish.

There is different approach, albeit not designed for competition, but a good ground for learning – a review. And a review can only be done with a dialogue with its creator. Only by knowing the aim of the photographer that we can assist in ways or methods that could be used to convey thoughts and emotions visually.

Truly that the art and the craft must come hand in hand – I have no doubts about it. A technically masterful image without a soul would make one into a machine, while a soulful image without technical mastery risks the message of not getting across.  But should one be forced to choose, I hope that we choose the latter rather than the former.

As Ansel Adams once said There is nothing worse than a sharp image of a fuzzy concept.”

With personal definitions abound, I think we can all agree that art is not a sport that a true winner can be gauged by speed, strength, height — or consensus. Its true measure is our inner voice.

 

Alessandra

Posted on May 18, 2014 at 2:36 pm | Categories: blog | No comments

ephemera

My prints starts at  HKD5,000 [link] but tonight, together with other wonderful items, 3 pieces from my Ephemera series will be up for auction – for charity.

Alessandra Tirona was born last March 2, 2014. In two months, she hasn’t even put on a pound. The doctors have told her parents she needs open heart surgery. The good news is that they are very confident that they can fix her little heart. The bad news is that it will cost an arm and a leg. This is where she needs our help. We will be having a benefit concert and auction on Sunday the 18th of May in Craft at the Fort strip. Generous friends like Basti Artadi and Wolfgang have offered to play for us and other incredible folks have donated awesome items like a two night stay in a 5 star resort in Bohol worth $1,000USD, or super car training and a hot lap in an M5 with JP Tuason, to be auctioned off. So all you have to do is show up and bid. Simple as that. Even if you don’t end up buying something, your presence alone (and the door charge of 500 pesos) will go a long, long way. Below is a list of the items that we have up for grabs. Feel free to already start bidding as it will set a reserve price for the night. Or make us an offer we can’t refuse and you can have it before then! And don’t worry if you can’t bid or you are not in a financial position to donate. Just remember that even a simple share on your social media pages with a gentle nudge to some of our common friends is still helping. Whatever it is, as long as it comes from your heart we can fix Alessandra’s. Thank you in advance. And see you on the 18th.

Source:
http://jamesdeakin.ph/alessandrasauction/

Hear-say

Posted on May 16, 2014 at 10:03 am | Categories: blog, News, photography | No comments

We’ve all done it, haven’t we? We’ve heard so many things about someone that before we’ve even had the chance of experience, our thoughts and actions are already clouded by the opinions of others.

The same goes in photography, well in this case, paper.

It was a year ago when I first heard about Tecco paper. I did a quick google and found nothing impressive. Fast forward a few more months, I was formally introduced to Tecco,  a paper that is available locally they say. I was going to have a print workshop and I needed variety of papers for the students to see. I was quite reluctant but I kept an open mind and tested the paper anyway.

Initial test – not good. But I knew, I can tweak it more. You see, I used the canned profile from the site and sometimes, they’re crap. The paper texture and the feel looks good but it was not hitting my Black and White. So we’ve made a custom gray profile for the paper and my printer.

Untitled-1

After a few days of testing, there you have it! I am perfectly happy with the results. I now have another paper on my arsenal 🙂

I was given more paper to test but well, you know, I tend to focus more on what initially caught my fancy. I was using Tecco PFR 295 on an Epson 3880. It has a paper texture more subtle than an Epson Velvet and can be compared to a Hahnemule Photo Rag. The paper base is warmer but not as warm as Ilford Gold Fibre Silk.

So that’s that. Test and see for yourself. Do not just blindly follow what everyone else is saying. Of course feedback is  important but remember that paper choice is by preference; and that the opinion of others are tainted by what they only know – and sometimes just heard. Own your first impression. Make your first impressions YOUR first impressions.

It would also be wise to take the same approach towards a person.

 

 

Not for everybody

Posted on May 1, 2014 at 11:03 am | Categories: blog, News, photography | No comments

You cannot please everybody

We’ve heard it many times, and yet when it happens, it always feel
like our chest has been stepped on.

You see, unlike in the online world, a portfolio review consists of a body of work in printed form and your critic is literally in front of you. It’s really different. You cannot choose to delete or just ignore the comments altogether. You’ll hear every spoken word. If you’re watching yourself, you’ll probably see the point when your heart gets broken just by looking at your face. And in my early years, I sometimes black out when I don’t like what I hear and tend to hear only what I like.

Words can indeed lift your soul or crush your spirit.
I know – I have went through all of that before. I came to the gallery all excited and went home with a huge rock of self-doubt.

If you have done your work correctly; if you have done your work to the fullest of your abilities; if you connect with your work deeply, then you know what you have is a part of you. Presenting it to someone for  their opinion is exciting and scary at the same time.

It takes a certain amount of courage (or arrogance) to show someone your work.

Ephemera

Ephemera – was rejected for a show in Beijing but was well accepted in Macao.

 

In the end, it’s a learning process. It’s a part of the creative path. I have learned more on that review alone than in any of my exhibitions. It’s one of many ways to mature. You should try it even just for once. You know what they say, the winner only remembers the win; the loser remembers everything.

Should you be fortunate enough to find someone you trust, whose opinions you value to critique your work – listen. Drop your guard. Leave your shield at home. Appreciate.  Approach with an open mind. Understand that their words can be a reflection of themselves. Do not think of them as right or wrong. Only you can know the truthfulness of your own work,  instead consider them as a guide.

And if you feel that your chest is being stepped on, check again. Maybe, just maybe, it’s our ego being deflated.

 

Ephemera on Macao Fine Art Fair: http://vimeo.com/80538527

 

 

Fan Mail

Posted on August 15, 2013 at 8:34 pm | Categories: blog, life, News, photography | One comment

We are all a fan of someone.

I wrote to Alan back in 2012 regarding his free workshop. Two years ago, on Ansel’s birthday, he started offering a free, yes a free 3 day one-on-one private workshop in his own home in Sta. Fe to an inspiring photographer. A $1,650 workshop value, this is his way of  honoring Ansel and keeping the spirit of generosity alive. His way of paying it forward.

Now, if you’re not familiar with Alan, Alan is a master of Black and White photography. He was an assistant of Ansel Adams for many years and was selected by A.A. himself to print his Yosemite Special Edition negatives – from 1975 until today. Exclusively.

http://www.alanrossphotography.com/

Unfortunately, I was not able to get the spot. But to my surprise, not only did he replied to my email – twice, but also sent me something in the post.

I am humbled. I am humbled that an icon took time to reply and spent money to send me something. He may have replied and sent something to all, but imagine how many would that be. Imagine the time and the cost. He also may have an assistant – but still, you get my point.

And as I mentioned earlier, we are all a fan of someone. And as such, you probably have fans as well. People that look up to you, people that asks for your guidance. You probably have fan mails too – and sometimes their questions annoys you.

redalan

If an icon took time to answer, who are we to ignore?

So let us take time answering those fan questions that we have. Let us not keep them waiting when we have the time. We must make time. Elementary and sometimes, repetitive as the questions may be, remember that we were once a beginner. Be thankful that someone thinks of us highly enough to seek our opinion. Be thankful that we are being given a chance to pay it forward.

And as we have received – we should give.

Sikat sa pagiging sikat

Posted on May 5, 2013 at 9:40 pm | Categories: blog, life, News, photography | No comments

Galing ako ng Trinoma kanina, andaming tao. Linggo kasi at panahon ng sahod. Sa gitna ng mall ay may made-up na stage – mukang may show pa! At kagaya ng inaasahan, dagsa ang mga taong hindi umaandar. Nakatayo. Nakatingin.

Wala pang tao sa entablado nyan. Sa patuloy kong paglalakad, biglang may nagsigawan, “tili” nga ata ang mas tamang salita. May mga nagkakagulo sa may bandang harapan. May celebrity ata na parating. At ayun na nga, kasama ng apat na bodyguards, dumaan sa harapan ko ang isang lalaki. Naka salamin, pakaway kaway habang ang mga tao ay tumitili at panay ang picture sa kanya.

Mukang sikat pero di ko kilala. Pagtapos ng eksena, tuloy lang ako ng lakad. Sariwa pa ang nangyari kaya pinag uusapan pa ito ng mga nakakita. May narinig akong nag-uusap, “ang pogi nya ano” sabi ng isa “oo nga, pero sino ba yun” ika ng pangalawa. Akala ko, tulad ko, baka di nya lang kakilala. Hanggang sa may narinig na naman ako na nagsabi “sino ba yun?”

Ang nakalilito ay isa sya sa mga tumitili kanina.

Napaalalahanan ako ng isang video na kamakailan ko lang napanuod: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XYU1a0lTTTw

Ganyan ata ang buhay. Madalas tayong madala ng alon. At hindi din nalalayo ang photography. Sa panahon ng social media, madami ang nakikilala sa dami ng kakilala. Ang karamihan, tanyag pero kung iisipin, walang gawa na nagmamarka sa alala.  Pag nagsama sama ang iba’t-ibang gawa ng iba, mahihirapan maituro at masabing “ito! ito ay kay …”

Sana, pagdating ng panahon, makilala ang pangalan natin dahil sa ating mga gawa, hindi kabaliktaran. Mas magandang malaman na sinundan ang ating mga likha patungo sa ating pangalan.

At sana nga ay dumating ang panahon.

Weston_Pepper_30_1930

Weston – Pepper Number 30, 1930

Ang Kulang

Posted on June 26, 2012 at 8:50 pm | Categories: blog, life, News, photography | No comments

Minsan, totoo na meron kang nalalagpasan. Minsan, mugugulat ka na meron ka pa lang ginto sa baul. At ganito nga ang nangyari.

Akala ko.

Malaki ang potensyal. Sinimulan ko buuin ang litrato. Mula sa pinaka maliit na bagay, hanggang sa malaki. Bawat kanto, bawat antas ng liwanag at dilim – sukat. Ang proportion at pagkakapantay pantay ng mga bagay? halos ikabulag. Binalik balikan ng madaming araw. Baka excited lang dahil bago. Pero habang tumatagal, habang binubuo – lalong gumaganda. Lalo akong ginaganahan. Konti na lang. Malapit na. Pagdaan ng maraming oras – natapos din.

Ang ganda. Tama ang sukat. Tama ang liwanag. Tama ang dilim. Pantay naman. Iniisip ko na kung gelatin print o’ pigment print sa papel na may OBA ang kailangan para mas maganda. Pero teka, pahinga muna.

Babad sa monitor. Tingin tingin. Ligo-tingin-kain-tingin… parang may kulang. Maganda naman, pero parang may kulang talaga. Di ko lang alam. Technically superior naman, naglalaro sa 235 hanggang 240 ang highlights at may shadow detail na nasa 10-25. Andaming pero. Parang tennis sa pag aalinlangan kung pangit ba o’ hindi – pabalik balik.

At sa biglang bugso ng lakas ng loob – ipost na sa facebook yan!

Pag dating sa facebook – pangit. Pangit ang compression ng facebook. Nagsisikan ang tono, nabasag ang mga detalye at sumagad ang highlights. Pangit ang litrato. Talo.

Pero nakita ko ang kulang.

Nakita ko na nakasandal ang ganda ng litrato sa teknikal nyang aspeto. Malinaw na kapag ito ay nawala ‘o nabawasan man lang, guguho ang buong larawan. Parang walang pakiramdam. Walang emosyon na ibinibigay. Walang kaluluwa. At yun na nga ang kulang.

Dahil sa realidad man o’ litrato, hindi lang teknikalidad ang nagpapanalo.

Pambihira, simbahan pa naman.

St. Andrew – Singapore 2011

 

Year of the Dragon

Posted on January 22, 2012 at 11:36 am | Categories: blog, life, News | No comments

Sa pagpasok ng taon ng Dragon, gusto kong magpasalamat.

May ngiti kong masasabi na naging mabuti sa’kin ang nagdaang taon. Nanatiling malusog ang mga mahal ko sa buhay at nakasama ko ang aking pamilya ng higit sa pangkaraniwan. Nadagdagan ako ng mga kaibigan at napagtibay ang samahan ng mga dati. Nabigyan ako ng mga pagkakataon makapag bahagi, bagaman ng konti, ng saya sa iba. Napag yaman ko ang sarili at nakapaglagay ng ngiti sa ilan.

At bagaman, may mga bagay din akong ginusto na hindi nangyari, hindi ito sapat para hindi magpasalamat. Datapwat, dapat pa ngang isipin na ito’y mga bagong pagsubok. Mga bagay na aabutin sa pagsalubong sa taon ng Dragon.

Angkinin natin ang bagong taon, at sa pag angkin sana ay sumobra – nang tayo naman ang maging biyaya sa iba.

Ikaw, nakapag pasalamat ka na ba?

 

Michael Kenna

Posted on August 16, 2011 at 6:16 pm | Categories: blog, life, News, photography | 3 comments

“Do you want to meet Mr. Kenna?”

At ganun na nga ang nangyari nakaraang Linggo. Sa bisa ng panyaya ng isang gallery na kumakatawan sa aming mga gawa, nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon personal na makilala ang isang idolo.

Sinimulan ni Michael ang pagsasalita sa isang pasasalamat – sa mga dumalo at pagkakataong naibigay sa kanya ng gallery. Ipinakiusap din nya sa lahat ng dumalo na patuloy na sumuporta sa gallery kung saan sya kasalukuyang nagsasalita. “This is very important” dagdag pa nya.

Sa biglaang dinig, iisipin mong parang isang malaking advertisement para sa gallery. Parang halik sa pwet ng may-ari. Pero sa kabilang banda, isa din itong lehitimong pagtawag ng suporta sa sining. Sining ng potograpiya. Wala naman syang sinabing tangkilikin ang sariling gawa.

Umpisa pa lang, alam ko na – may mapupulot ako dito.

Hindi ko na hihimay-himayin ang mga sumunod na nangyari. Ibabahagi ko na lang ang mga bagay na narinig ko ayon sa aking interpretasyon kahalo ng sarili kong pananaw.

* Laging magpasalamat.
* Magtiyaga. Higit sampung taon syang naglingkod sa iba. Taga print.
* Magbalik sa komunidad. Magbigay kung kaya. Pagyamanin ang komunidad kung saan ka nabibilang. Mali siguro isipin na “kalaban” o kompetensya ang kapwa artista. Magtulungan. Isiping katuwang ang kapwa sa pag-angat ng kamalayan. Lalo na sa potograpiya kung saan madami pa ring pagtatalo kung sining o hindi.
* Magbilad sa iba pang porma ng sining. Makinig, manuod, magbasa. Ang mga nakikita, naririnig at nararanasan ay halo-halong humuhulma ng iyong pagkatao na magdidikta ng iyong sining.
* Magbigay ng pagkilala sa mga nauna sa’yo. Ang impluwensya nila ay hindi masusukat.
* Kilalanin ang mga kasabay mo.
* Mas madalas sa minsan, wala sa gamit yan.
* Gumamit ng mga bagay na komportable sa’yo.
* Hindi mo kasing galing ang sarili pagkatapos ng matagal na panahon na di pag gawa. Kakalawangin ka, kahit hindi ka bakal.
* Nasa print ang magic. Kung di mo lubusan maintindihan, tanungin mo ako mamaya. Mahaba kasi ipaliwanang.
* May tsamba.
* Madalas maka tsamba ang mas madalas sumubok.

Sa dulo, napatotohanan ang mga bagay na matagal na nating alam. Ang iba naman na nabanggit ay nag-iimbita ng mas malalim na pagsusuri. Kung ano pa man, naging makabuluhan ang hapon na yon dahil bukod sa tangan kong librong may lagda – kasama din nito ang kaalaman ng isang taong pumitik at patuloy na pumipitik sa loob ng tatlumpo’t limang taon.

At syempre, di ko na papalagpasin ang pagkakataon. Sa likod ng aking mga gawa, may nangyaring di ko inaasahan. Inimbitahan ko syang mag-pa picture. Pinoy e! 🙂

 

paglipas ng limang taon

Posted on January 26, 2011 at 9:29 pm | Categories: blog, life | No comments

“basta ako tol, pag tatlong araw na, wala pa ring tao – pack up mo na ko”

Tandang tanda ko pa ang biruan namin ni RJ sa lamay ng bunso kong kapatid. Nagbiro kami dahil sa dami ng pumunta sa lamay ni Richter. Mga taong hindi ko kilala. Mula sa mga skater boyz na walang pamasahe hanggang sa mga propesor. Mula sa nakahubad ng pang itaas hanggang sa naka barong. Pati ang mga taong nakabanggaan nya ng opinyon, nandun – nagbibigay respeto.

Nagbabalik na naman ang mga alala ni Richter. Sunod sunod na naman akong nakakatanggap ng liham sa mga dati nyang kaibigan. Hinahanap kung saan sya huling nagpapahinga. Yung iba kaibigan sa highschool. Yung iba, nung kolehiyo. Yung iba, hindi man lang nabalitaan. Lahat nagsasabi na naging malaking impluwensya si Richter sa buhay nila. Yung isa, sa musika. Yung isa, sa relihiyon. Yung isa, kursong kukuhain sa kolehiyo.

Lahat sila si Richter ang hanap.

Siguro, nagsasabi lang sila ng mabuti kasi umalis na ang kapatid ko. Ganyan naman talaga. Pero andami? hindi nga? seryoso?

Nakakahiya na nakapang hihinayang. Lumalabas na di ko kilala ang sarili kong kapatid. Nag dududa ako sa mga papuri sa kanya.

Yung iba, buhay pa pero nakakalimutan na. Yung iba naman- malakas pa, pilit naman kinakalimutan.

Yung kapatid ko, paglipas ng limang taon, buhay pa rin.

“What we do in life, echoes in eternity.”

Totoo nga siguro.

POP Beijing at Sisiman

Posted on January 13, 2011 at 11:29 am | Categories: blog, News, photography | No comments

“Pano ang diskarte ulit?”

Malabo pero dahil POP-Beijing – laban yan!

Si Renen ang nag plano ng overnight sa Bataan. Pupunta daw kami sa may parola na nakita nya sa isang magazine. Galing lang kami sa pagkasawi sa Batangas – plano naman yun ni PR. Alas dos ng madaling araw umalis, naligaw, nagtanong tanong sa mga lokal ng alas kwatro, inikot ang buong Batanggas – nauwi sa Mcdonalds Lipa ng alas sais ng umaga. Magandang kwento pero ibang kwento na yun. Balik tayo sa Sisiman 🙂

Kaya ganun na lang siguro ang gigil para makapag shoot. Nag research, nag google at nagbasa basa naman si Renen kung saan at paano kaya game na ‘to kahit wala pang isa samin ang nakakarating sa lugar.

Umaga nang January 3, sa may POEA Ortigas kami nagkita kita. Kaka-atras ko lang sa pagkuha ng OEC dahil sa mala ahas na haba ng pila. Pagtawid ko sa tulay papuntang Robinson’s Galleria, nakita ko na agad si Owen. Sinisipat ang shrine – umaanggulo. 9:00 na ng umaga.

At duon na nga kami nag assemble. Dumating sila Dom, PR, Don Don (na galing pa ng Bicol) at Renen (kakalapag lang galing Beijing)

Larga na.

Ayos naman ang byahe. Yun nga lang, nasa likod kami ni Owen ng sasakyan. Masikip at mainit.  Sarsa na lang ang kulang sardinas na – ika nga ng matatanda.  Naging sampayan din ng twalya ang likod ng sasakyan – pangontra init.  Mas pinili na lang namin na ‘wag mainitan kesa tumanaw ng magandang tanawin.

Pag dating sa Sisiman, may lumusong, may nag pausok ng mahiwaga, may nainis sa ingay at meron ding nagkwento na akala mo e limang taon gulang lang kami.

“Ang lakas ng sumpa, ang kailangan ko’y …” – ang kwento ni Manong drayber na di ko malaman kung saang barber shop nya nakuha.

Overnight sa Mariveles Bataan. Tatlong litrato. Karanasang panalo. Salamat kay Renen 🙂

 

 

souvenir

Posted on August 26, 2010 at 8:10 am | Categories: blog, in between, life, News | No comments

Matapos mangyari ang lahat, akala ko nasabi na din ang lahat.

Napuno ang mga  instrumento ng pagpapahayag ng mga batikos sa pamahalaan at kapulisan. Telebisyon, radyo, dyaryo at internet – nabanggit na sa lahat. Alam na ng lahat. Hindi na ako nagsasalita dahil alam kong wala din naman akong maitutulong. Alam ko din na walang buti’ng idudulot kung uulitin ko lang ang sinabi ng iba, magtutunog sirang plaka lang ako at hindi rin naman ako sang-ayon sa pagsambit ng paulit ulit ng mga bagay na negatibo.

Mas pinili kong manahimik…. hanggang kahapon. Kahapon, napalitan ang lungkot ng galit.

Sige na, di tayo marunong.
Sige na, lahat tayo nagkakamali.
Sige na, wala tayong gamit.
Sige na sa lahat.

Mapapalagpas ko.

Hindi kasi tayo naturuan.
Tao kasi tayo.
Salat kasi tayo sa pera (wag na natin ipasok ang korupsyon)
Hindi ka pwedeng magtaka kung ang laman ng bao ay ampaw.

Nabanggit pa nga ng isang beteranong crisis negotiator na nagpamalas ng tapang ang mga pulis – kulang lang talaga sila sa kaalaman at gamit.

Pero ang magpakuha ng litrato na parang ”souvenir” sa lugar ng trahedya ay isang malaking insulto sa mga nawalan at kahihiyan ng marami sa’tin – lalo na kung katatapos pa lang ng pangyayari at hindi pa naghihilom ang mga sugat. Hindi naman kailangan ng talino o’ yaman para maging sensitibo. Alam ko na kapos tayo sa madaming bagay pero hindi sa puso. Ayaw kong maniwala na wala tayong pagmamalasakit.

Hindi natin ginusto ang nangyari. Hindi man yan maintindihan ng mga naulila, mauunawaan yan ng may malawak na kaisipan. Pero paano mo ipapaliwanag ang larawan ng ilang pulis sa lugar ng trahedya – habang nakangiti.

Ayaw ko maniwala na bastos tayo, pero ang mga pulis na nasa larawan, ayun – pilit pinapatunayan na mali ako.

Kalabisan naman.

Luneta Hostage Crisis

 

starbucks

Posted on August 16, 2010 at 9:25 pm | Categories: blog, in between | No comments

Magkano ulit ang kape?

Hindi mapag kakaila na madami sa atin ang adik sa kape. Kape, sa unang tingin pero kung bibigyan mo ng mas malalim na pansin, maiintindihan mo na hindi lang kape ang starbucks.

Sumasalamin sa starbucks ang mas malalim na pangangailangan ng madami na maging marangya kahit sandali lang. Magandang dekorasyon, komportableng upuan, konting konti na lang para ka nang nasa Amerika. Mura nga naman ang isang basong kape kung mararanasan mo ang buhay marangya – kahit saglit lang.

Subukan mong sabihin na bulok ang starbucks at pauulanan ka ng madaming pintas ng mga panatiko. Ignorante, mangmang, walang alam at marami pang bagay ang ipupukol sa’yo para patunayan na super sarap tudamaksimum ang kape ng starbucks at wala ng mas masarap pa dito. Buong puso silang naniniwala kahit di naman talaga nila alam.

Ang starbucks isa ng relihiyon.

Aaminin ko na masarap ang kape, pero kape lang yun. Kadalasan, patakbo mo itong kukunin papunta sa opisina at hindi tulad ng madami sa atin na kung makatambay sa kapihan e parang may contest ng trip to Jerusalem. Agawan sa upuan. Patagalan. Nag uunahan sa labas para duon umupo o di naman, kahit sa may bintanang salamin na lang. Mas kita, mas ayos. Tumatanaw ng mga dumadaan habang humihigop ng kapeng malamig. Malamig kasi dalawang oras ng iniinom.

Hindi ko kayang isulat lahat pero alam mo di ba? alam mo na masarap tumambay sa starbucks dahil alta sociedad.

Tulad ng maraming bagay, hindi naman tayong lahat, pero madami sa’tin.

San nga ba nagpupunta ang mga taong nasa starbucks nuong wala pang starbucks….?

Makapagtimpla nga ng milo.

more human

Posted on August 13, 2010 at 9:27 pm | Categories: blog, photography, Print | No comments

I just finished an interview for POP-PHOTO magazine in China. Together with my gallery representatives, we sat down for the question and answer. Knowing that I came from pigment prints, I was asked what I think of my platinum/palladium. I looked intently to my prints and mumbled, “it feels more human.” Then I said it again louder with more conviction.

It’s like I just discovered something new.

In comparison to my inkjet prints, the platinum palladium prints are with flaws. Gradations are not as smooth. Things are not as sharp. Even the tones are not even for each print. But why does it feel more ‘alive’ ? why are they so attractive? I know that it’s all subjective but why is it to me. Why when what I aim for is perfection in every piece.

I recognise that the same characteristics can be said to the prints of some photographers I look up to. Their prints in silver gel and pt/pd are with flaws while their digital ones are more ‘perfect.’

What’s going on?

Then I realised that, maybe, in some level, I connect more with the scratches and dustspots because I am human – with imperfections. And since platinum palladium prints are coated by hand – no two prints will look exactly the same.

My work now represents me more than ever.

Flawed.

Human.

Unique.

Collector’s Guide Platinum Palladium

textbum

Posted on July 19, 2010 at 8:40 pm | Categories: blog, life, News | No comments

The title is derived from the famous song sexbomb of  Tom Jones – another song we all love but hate. Let’s leave that for another discussion.

Tagalog na.

TXTSPEAK

Bago pa man naging sikat ang mobile phones ay ginagawa na ito ng mga hacker (in it’s true sense)

Sa pagpapaikli o pagpapalit palit ng letra ng salita, naiiwasan ng mga hacker ang mga word filters. Ang resulta, naitatawid nila ang mensahe na gusto nilang iparating.

halimbawa: ang porn ay ginagawang pron o pr0n, kung ang word filter ay porn o any four letter word composing of p,o,r,n.

Isa ang layunin. Ang makapagtawid ng mensaheng malinaw.

Aba’y ano na ang nangyari ngayon?

Hindi ko maintindihan.

Meron bang nagbukas ng dam ng mga bagay na di mainam at madaming pinoy ang nabasa?

Naiintidihan ko ang dahilan sa likod ng putol putol na salita sa mobile phone. Kailangan kasing paikliin ang mga salita para magkasya sa limitadong bilang ng letra. Mas mabilis. Mas matipid. Pero bakit kailangan palitan ang mga letra kung pareho lang naman ang bilang?

Aco kapalit ng ako (at isang damakmak na kumbinasyon)

Minsan, lalo pa ngang humahaba (acoh)

Bakit kailangan mag text speak kung hindi naman mobile ang gamit at hindi naman limitado ang pag-gamit ng letra?

Bakit textspeak pa rin sa mga bulletin boards at forums. Minsan pa nga pati sa formal writing, may nakakalusot. Nakasanayan na kasi.

Dahil kaya isa itong paraan para masabing “uy cool ‘tong kausap ko.”

Alam ba natin na tayo lang din ang nakakaunawa sa sinasabi natin? Sa katunayan, hindi pa nga lahat.

Hindi tulad ng xoxox na maraming banyaga ang nakakaunawa, bagaman hindi din lahat.

Alam ba natin na sa internet, sa paraan lang ng pagsusulat makakasilip ang mambabasa kung ano ang personalidad ng sumusulat? edad, pinag-aralan at kung taga-saan

Ano ang opinyon mo sa taong magsulat ay ganito?

miz coh na kau 2 Mayang!!! tsupmwahpzzzzzzzzzz…. kiz mo rin ko kay eng2x mmmmmmmmmmmmmwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhppppppppzzzzz!!!

Dapat pa ba nating pag-usapan ang AlTeRnAtInG cAps?